You are Here. I am Not. :) I am now somewhere else. Again.

So, seriously, I've made yet another blog. Every now and then I feel like I need a "fresh start", especially when I feel like I'm just in a different place in my life.

If you'd care to join me there (at the new blog address OR in that different place in my life) - Click here. 

Cheers.

Welcome Joshua David Thiessen, and a new stage in my life!

Joshua David Thiessen, born April 6, 2010, at 10:45pm.


Since his wonderful arrival ushers in a new stage in my life (Mom to 2 kids and, for at least a 16 months, a stay-at-home one at that) - I'm starting a new blog. You're welcome to join me there!

Know who gives me the creeps?

So, no baby yet. On an unrelated topic:

Know who gives me the creeps? Here are my top 5 famous creepsters.

5) Tom Cruise - Okay, I know he's old news by this point, but with a recent movie coming out ("Knight and Day"), which looks like it may just be pretty entertaining, I can't help but think about how my feelings have changed towards this prolific actor. Aside from loving his acting style and choice of varied roles, I admit - I used to think he was an incredibly beautiful man. What turned me off, you wonder? Well, part of it may be his extreme involvement with the whole "secret society of Scientology" thing. It's not that I'm knocking his religious beliefs - it's just - well - I can't quite put my finger on it - it just seems so bizarre, how the rich and fabulous Scientology crew talk about/don't quite talk about how the whole thing works and is connected. But the Scientology is only a tiny part of Tom's creeping-me-out factor. I mean, the world is made up of so many different belief factors - I'm pretty sure it's not a huge deal. No, the real ewwww of Mr. Cruise is his relationship with the much younger Katie Holmes. It's not their age that's the issue, I don't think. I'm not bothered by age discrepancies in general. I mean, I've found my fair share of older men devastatingly attractive - and some slightly younger men too, I admit. No, what's gross is the fact that she used to idolize him when she was a little girl. "I think every little girl dreams about [her wedding]. I used to think I was going to marry Tom Cruise." (Holmes in 2004 - BEFORE dating and marrying Tom Cruise). She also said something one time about how she used to have a poster up on her wall of him. And now she's his wife. Hmmm... I don't know - that's just kind of gross to me.

4) Speaking of men I used to find beautiful, I can't help but add Mel Gibson to my list of the creepydeepy famous. I used to love this actor for, like Cruise, his acting and looks :) - but now, he kind of makes my skin crawl. And it has nothing to do with his religious beliefs or the movie "The Passion", which is when the media first turned on him. No, I loved that movie and the fact that he had conviction - and I really didn't find it the least bit antisemitic. HOWEVER, I did find his later antisemitic drunken tirade - well - antisemitic - and wholly unappealing. And THEN... then... well, then he divorced his wife of 30 years, of whom he had 7 children with, and now lives with his younger girlfriend (albeit not any 26 year old Katie Holmes - This girlfriend is only 14 years younger than Gibson), and the two now have a baby. (How sweet). The man is 53 years old, people, and has grandchildren.

3) Tiger Woods/Jesse James: These two douches - one a classy pro-golfer and the other a famous but crass car-guy - are interchangeable to me. Do I need to elaborate? Not only did they cheat (nothing new, nothing shocking, nothing uncommon), but... BUT... they cheated on their very beautiful wives fairly early on in their marriages, with NUMEROUS women. Not only that, but numerous SLEEZY women. And brought whatever diseases and/or nasty germs home to their faithful spouses. Can I get an "EWWWW" here? (Oh - and Tiger's apology - gross.) Seriously, Tiger/Jesse, good choice on the girls there. I mean, besides being super trashy, they also happily sold you out to the media. Nice work. Men.

2) John Mayer: Where to start? What a creep. Besides the whole porn thing, his sleazy comments about his ex-girlfriends, his bragging about his sexual prowess, his attitude towards women in general - suddenly, hearing his voice on the radio crooning "your body is a wonderland" triggers my gag reflexes.

1) Justin Bieber: The young Mr. Bieber - with no public religious statements dogging him, no racist rants, no reports of gross infidelity, no divorces under his belt (the boy's 16 years old) - may seem like an odd choice for my #1 creepy celebrity. But here's the thing. The kid's 16 years old, barely hit puberty, I suspect (not to be mean, but the boy's singing, while very pretty, sounds similar in pitch to his female colleagues), was born in 1994 for crying out loud - and yet seems to be being marketed as some kind of sex symbol (shudders). Not that it's his fault, I suppose. But nevertheless.


There you have it - my 5 top creepsters. True, I don't really KNOW these men, and perhaps if I did, I wouldn't be so quick to cringe every time I see their name in the popular media. But, things being as they are - well, there you have it. Now, to go to bed and dream of far less disappointing famous celebrities. Like... well.. like... like... I'm drawing a blank here.

My McDonalds

You know what's not so much fun as it used to be? Lunch from McDonald's. I used to love that place - seriously. I did. I'd have an "All Canadian Meal" any time I didn't have time to pack a lunch in the morning. For those unfamiliar with the name-gimmick, this is similar (or identical) to an "All American Meal" at the McDonald's in the States: a cheese burger, a small fry, and a small fountain drink (in my case, a coke). Then, life got extra busy, and sometimes I'd have supper from Micky-Ds too: Often in the form of a satisfying McChicken meal. If I was feeling healthful, I'd substitute the fries (in either of the meals) for apple slices.

Now, when I'm forced to eat there, I regret every last greasy, over-salted bite. For some reason, the passion in my McDonald's relationship is just gone. Maybe it's because husband - due to high cholesterol - has needed to eat healthier, causing the whole family to follow - and so my taste buds are simply out of junk-food-eating-practice... Maybe it's because I'm so aware of making sure my toddler limits her intake of crap like that, I've become more aware of what I'm taking into my body. Maybe something about the menu has changed. Maybe it's the pregnancy.

Who knows. But I've been realizing, much to my surprise, that I absolutely hate that place. And the sad thing is: My toddler now loves it. But the silver lining? All she wants from there are apple slices, milk, and a toy. And as a ridiculously busy mom - I consider that a definite win.

If I could control my immediate universe...

So, on my usual commute to work this morning, I encountered a number of sigh-inducing occurrences, which caused me to wish I had more control over things I have little to no control over.

This morning, if I could control my immediate universe...

1) I would have awoken this morning to a bright, warm, sunny spring day rather than peering out of my window at dismal gray skies over a blanket of white snow.

2) My car would NOT be invisible to any drivers.

3) Ordering water with "extra-extra ice - like, a LOT of ice" would result in water with lots of ice, rather than a cup of luke-warm water with a few pieces pieces of ice floating sadly at the top.

4) "Extra whipped cream" would be completely calorie free and be served on every coffee beverage from Starbucks, WITHOUT the raised, judgemental eye-browns from the skinny barista behind the counter.

5) My bank account would not be empty (due to an earlier unforeseen flat tire - curse you, random nail! - and my general inability to do simple math) -

6) Clinique would have their bonus time NOW so I could buy the correct foundation, instead of using my current colour, which doesn't quite match my skin tone, in the powder form, which isn't so great on dry skin (looks like - uh - powder). Not that I COULD buy the correct foundation anyway at the moment (see 5).

7) Avon nail polish "Speed Dry!" - would last more than 8 hours without beginning to flake off. Or how about not flake off at all?

8) Time would stand still for - say - about 4 hours, so I would a) not be late for work and b) have some time to get stuff done when I get there and c) sneak in a nap in the staffroom.

9) My car's exterior would stay clean for more than 2 days.

10) Did I mention that it would be a bright, warm, sunny spring day? Oh, I did? Then how about this one: that I could go for more than 30 minutes without having a make a mad dash for the washroom. I'd like that. (Baby's due in 10 days - can I add that I'd like he or she to be on time or, maybe, mmmm... 4 days early? That would be awesome.)

Here and Now

Sometimes I wish consistently living in the present was easier for me. Often, I find myself getting caught up living in the past - wishing I was still there or, conversely, fighting memories of regrets or past hurts or lost friendships. Other times, I find myself living for the future - what will the next stage of life be, how can I accomplish the new goals I've set for myself, what educational decisions will I make for my children? But I forget to be fully in my present.

I mean, memories are an important part of who I am, sure, and goals and plans are great. But some nights I look back on my day and wonder why I didn't just enjoy being there more. Rather than planning or worrying, why am I not just soaking in the gift of each day?

I keep talking to my daughter about Spring - how we'll go for walks and play in the park - and I wonder if I'm taking away from our present NOW time. I wonder if I'm fostering in her that annoying trait of "tomorrow" mentality that I am often caught in myself. I can see already - now I'm talking about spring, in spring I will be looking forward to the beach and camping season of summer, and when summer rolls around, we'll have images of the changing leaves of fall - and in fall, the excitement for the first snow and the glow of Christmas. It's what I do - but I'd like to do less of it. I'm just not sure how to go about changing the way I see time here.

I do love my present, despite the imperfections of life. I love the warming season, the time spent reading to my daughter and tucking her in, the simple marking dates with my husband (we're both teachers), and the final weeks at my school with my students. I love the now - but I have trouble keeping it in focus when I'm so distracted by the "then" and the "and then". I wonder how someone goes about changing their focus. Or if most of us are living in some other time than the present.

Ever been nine months pregnant...

...well, 38 weeks? That's me right now. Feeling as big as a planet. My first pregnancy - I loved every minute of it, despite being sick, terrified, and in physical agony. I would throw up and come out grinning, pronouncing how much I loved being pregnant. And I really did. Rachel was my little miracle baby. I'd spent too long envying baby-makers and (in spite of myself) despising women who complained about their pregnancies. When I finally had my chance - looooved it. Loved my shape, loved the clothes, loved the expectant feeling - loved, like I said - even the discomforts. It was when I first realized that anyone who has ever carried a baby and really thought about it can't truly deny the existence of God.

Now, baby two. Still a miracle, a wonder, a testament to God's workmanship. But.

Nothing fits me decently, nor has for the duration of this pregnancy. I was showing after 9 weeks. Recently, though, I found out that until last month some people thought I'd just put on a whole lot of weight. I have put on a lot of weight, by the way. I can't focus on anything. I'm constantly sick to my stomach and have been throughout this entire pregnancy - without that new, excited wonderment that sustained me during the first one. Right now, as I sit at my desk in the classroom I teach in, I am resisting the urge to throw up. I've also been exhausted for the past 36 weeks, and I'm planning to teach up until next Friday, the week before I'm due - which is April 3rd, if you're counting. My whole body hurts, and I've been waking up with cramps in my calves the like I've never even imagined. (Actually, I think I experienced them during the first pregnancy, but again, it was coloured by this sense of wonderment I had back then.) Nothing tastes good to me. I'm out of breath simply walking from one room to the next - never mind trying to carry on a conversation! I have a ton of stuff to do at work still, but no energy or focus to do it with. Oh, and I'm terrified about the delivery.

My personal life is a bit of a confusion lately too, which has made me feel, I think, sicker and tireder (can I use those words?) - although I'm learning to not trust my own understanding and to trust that there is a plan - and that I can only be responsible for my own actions - and that in itself is really important, I think.

On the bright side, I AM really excited about this baby, miracle baby number 2 - even though we're not as ready this time around (no nursery or cradle set up yet. - but we do have a car seat!)

I know this baby is an indescribable gift, and am so thankful to be able to have he or she. Rachel is excited to be a big sister, and I'm excited to give her a sibling.

Nevertheless, though, I don't know quite what I'll do if my water breaks while I'm teaching.

... I found this...

So, I was trying to find an amusing but appropriate comic to put on my Print Communications test (I'm THAT dedicated)... and I found this timely comic on toothpaste for dinner.

It didn't work for my test, but it did seem appropriate to post here. :)

Tim Horton's tease!

So, this morning I had lemon spread on toast - a new taste experience for me. I commented to Zig afterwards that it was okay, but it made me want lemon meringue pie. Zig said it made HIM want a lemon filled donut.

Mmmm. That DID sound good. Already tasting the anticipated sweet treat from Tim Hortons, which I immediately promised myself for on the way to work, I stopped when Zig also commented that they have a new pumpkin spice muffin there - infused with cream cheese.

Mmmm. Cream cheese pumpkin spice muffin sounded just as good. Maybe better? Well, would have to choose just one. I decided I would go IN rather than drive through, in order to look at my two options.

THEN, on my way to work, I heard a Tim Horton's commercial reminding me about this new pumpkin season - adding that they have a pumpkin spice DONUT, which goes, they exclaimed convincingly, just perfectly with a medium coffee.

Mmmmmmm. Well, now I would have THREE delicious options to chose from.

So, I drove my 40 minutes to work, and made it just in enough time to swing by the nearby T.H. I couldn't wait to peruse my options and make a choice. To my dismay, their racks were FULL... except for the two empty trays with the lie below, "Try our NEW Pumpkin Spice Donut" and "Try our NEW Pumpkin Spice Muffin". I couldn't believe it. There wasn't a crumb in there, which made me suspect they had never had any out in the first place. Cruel fate. OR bakers.

With a sigh, I resigned myself to the lemon selection - at least it made my choice a little easier. EXCEPT... THERE WERE NO LEMON DONUTS EITHER!!! In fact, there wasn't even space for them. I asked, to make sure. The woman behind the counter, (who had absolutely no expression on her face or in her voice) simply re-read the only cream-filled options, "strawberry and blueberry".

I left empty handed. There's a second Tim's in town here, and I'm already plotting my trek there during my break.

Breakfast Foods

So, I've always had a dysfunctional relationship with breakfast. I mean, I LIKE breakfast, but it always creates problems.

For instance - people insist it is important for an efficient metabolism. While that may be true, if I SKIP breakfast, I'm not even hungry until lunch. But when I eat breakfast, I'm STARVING by 10:00. This makes me, of course, not only eat breakfast, but also snack. Again, people say snacks are great - but I think it all depends on the type of snack you have... and let's just say my snack choices are not always healthy ones.

Nevertheless, I don't skip breakfast anymore. I tend to be swayed by leading thoughts on health, so I dutifully make time in my busy morning to eat. But this brings other problems.

First of all, I like cereal in the morning. But for some reason, cereal (maybe the milk, maybe some other ingredients) makes me feel a little sick afterwards. This makes me eat MORE food to try to quell the sick feeling, leaving me MORE sick because on top of the cereal and milk, I've eaten too much...

Also, I'm supposed to be eating low glycemic foods and making healthful choices. This means whole grains and less sugars. These days - Bleeech. No thanks. So I've been having Cinnamon Toast Crunch instead, every morning. Mmmm. (But like all breakfast cereals, it leaves me a little sick - so I usually try to balance the unhealthy CTC with an orange afterwards.)

Today, though, I tried to go a healthier route, and selected a whole-grain muesli cereal from my cupboard. It also had raisins, cranberries, rice, oats, almonds, and lots and lots of fiber. Healthy! Too healthy. I followed that healthy choice with some Nacho Cheese Doritos. Then, more of them.

Breakfast is my enemy. Well, breakfast and my lack of self control, I suppose.

Anticipation -

The husband made this video today, but it said exactly what I wanted to post about today, so I copied it and placed it here. Enjoy!

Time Flies

Time flies by when you're having fun. And I am having fun - so I wish it wouldn't.

My daughter Rachel is no longer a little baby. While she'll always be MY baby, in reality, the truth is she's a toddler now. A sweet, funny, smart, active, totally wonderful toddler. And I love this stage - LOVE it. But as the husband pointed out the other day, now that she's two, she has completed 10% on her journey to 20 years old. Wow. Time REALLY flies.

But right now, we're having fun with our little toddler. For instance, she's potty training - which is way more cute than I thought it would be. She's had FOUR dry days in a row so far - wearing diapers only for naps and night. :) And she's highly insulted if you try to put diapers on her when it's not nap time. And she had her first pony ride and her first hay ride (the best part for her was getting pulled by the tractor). She plays imaginary games and makes us pretend tea. She says Mommy is her best friend - but then adds that Daddy is her friend too, and then says that we're all best friends. She sings songs and hums tunes and tells stories about her day. Every single day with my little girl is a gift. But sometimes I wish time would just slow down a little and let me savour it a little longer.

Then again, I hear every stage is equally wonderful. I hope it's true, because I'm sure having fun.

Email Housecleaning

So, I finally emptied my email again. I had 406 new messages and something like 508 in total. The "new" messages were all ones that I had looked at... For each of these, I had read the subject line and mentally dealt with the email... but I hadn't actually opened it or - obviously - deleted it. But, tonight, after months of harassment by the husband, I finally did it. The emails I wanted to keep for-ev-er, I put into folders. Then, I ruthlessly deleted everything else. But I read each subject line first, to make sure I wasn't deleting GOLD.

It still felt a little sad... and so final. But now... now, my inbox is completely empty. Ready to be filled up again. I can't wait! :)

The Great Shoe Dilemma

So, no women at my work really wear heels. They just don't. And I can get that. I mean, in a school setting, they're not terribly practical (Not that they'd be practical anywhere, I suppose).

But I'm a heels girl, myself. I wear heels for a few reasons. The first is because Zig likes heels. He does. He doesn't dictate my footwear, but he does have his preferences - and I do aim to please. :) Another reason is because I'm fairly short, and heels add some height. Also, most women know that heels do very nice things to a girl's calves (keeping them in shapely flex). I've also been wearing heels since I was fifteen, although back it the day, it was chunky heels, then wedges. Only recently have I moved into a skinnier heel.

I have, however, been beginning to question how long I can continue my relationship with the high heel.

I mean, I have to be honest here. They are not overly comfortable. I don't care how deluxe the high heel is, when your foot is at an unnatural angle, you're not going to be walking on clouds. And I don't spend the money on deluxe high heels anyway - I max out at $60. And let me tell you - my feet hate me for it.

Also, the high heels slow me down when I'm trying to book it from my classroom to the photocopier across the school. And they're far from stealthy. Try sneaking up chatters and skippers, and the rhythmic "clip-clop-clip-clop" gives me away every time. Not to mention the break in focus when I'm walking around the class to help students at their desks. So - in short - my high heel shoes are are uncomfortable, inconvenient, and disruptive.

Why not flats, you ask? Well, here's my problem. I don't' like flats. I hate my gait and my profile when I'm in non-heels. They make me feel less feminine, less professional, and less... well... less happy, generally.

I asked the husband if any women at his school (he's a teacher too) wear heels, and he said that many female teachers do - maybe even most of them! But in my school, I feel like an abnormality. And a vain one at that!

So - I'm torn with indecision. Do I wear the heels for the gait, the vanity, and the inner satisfaction, or do I make the practical decision and move to those "work shoes" sitting in my closet, promising happier feet, better mobility, and a quieter classroom?

(Sigh). Sometimes it's hard being a women.

I told a lie. A big one. But it was an accident - so it doesn't count, right?

Uug. I'm getting as bad as those OTHER bloggers who never actually blog. School has, of course, been busy, but that's not really an excuse. Just lazy, I suppose. I even had ideas and inspirations. But - no follow through. Anyway, something interesting...something interesting...

Okay, here's something: Did you know wasps don't sting, only bite? No, you didn't know that? That's because it's NOT TRUE. At least, not according to every site I can find on the topic this evening.

But here's what happened: these 2 Science teachers at my school told me it was - insisted that only bees sting, and wasps only BITE. When they told me this, I was SHOCKED. FLOORED. So I asked, more than once, "Are you sure?" They were. I clarified: "So if I tell other people this, I won't be wrong?" They said I wouldn't.

So I spread this fact. Oh, I told people. Many people. This was earth-shattering. EARTH SHATTERING.

And those people believed me. Little innocents... how could they know I was setting them up for future humiliation, as they continue to spread my misinformation. But why wouldn't they believe me, when I was so sure of this new, groundbreaking knowledge? Wasps don't sting - just bite!

Of course, I should have told the husband first. He never believes anything I say. Not that he thinks I'm lying (I'm the world's worst liar!) - no, he never believes anything I say because he knows that, quite often, I may just be wrong. Especially when I'm telling him a "scientific fact". So, when I finally told my husband the new truth about the non-stinging, only biting wasps, he wrinkled his nose at me, cocked his head, and said (without a question-mark), "Really." I told him that it was a scientific fact - that I had it on the best authority. Again, deadpan, he asked, "Who." I told him. He shook his head, as if that was all he needed to know. "Let's look it up" he said.

We did. We searched the Internet for evidence that I may be right. For once. But, much to my chagrin and his expectations, there was no evidence to support their claim, except a modest concession - as far as we can tell, male wasps do not sting. Great.

So if you hear a rumour that no wasps sting - only bite - just think: there's a good chance that it came from me.